Saturday, May 6, 2017

The Car on the Wrong Side of the Road


(Image from pixabay.com)

You see someone driving a car on the wrong side of the road. You can see the driver's face clearly. What would be your reaction the next time you see this driver again, though this time the car is in the right direction?

Well, I experienced something somewhat similar quite recently. I liked to read passages and watch talks of a popular spiritual guru. I found his talks to be quite insightful, and appealing. However, recently, I found his views on a topic close to my heart, to be diametrically opposite to mine. To me, it seemed that this one time he was driving on the wrong side of the road. I further felt that just maybe, he had taken his particular position with the expectation that it would be popular.

After this, all further talks and writings of his seemed not to inspire me. I thought I might as well move away from his writings and speeches completely. After a period of silence and calm though, it seemed that this reaction was inappropriate. Nevertheless, I continued to hold an opposite view on the matter which had triggered this reaction. Had this happened between two friends, we could have potentially debated it further, explained our positions and possibly amicably continued to disagree.

As I pondered further over this, I realized I had several choices which were all credible - I could segment his talks into categories which I wanted to follow, I could listen/read all of them and decide what I wanted to absorb from it, I could listen to other speakers and contrast views to introspect, and I could also invite opinions from other friends and see if I could learn something new. These are all choices – far less extreme, also more sensible and appropriate. Quite possibly, it would also be mentally more calming.

While we walk together with others many times in life, in fact, we are also walking alone. Each of us has to find his own way, however closely we follow others.

Sometimes I will follow, sometimes I will lead, sometimes I will wander, sometimes I will get lost, and yet I will always move, listening to the voice within.

15 comments:

  1. Very well written Bharath. Of late i can think of kapil sharma being on wrong side of road and losing his comic charm altogether maybe forever.

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    1. Thanks Deepak. Yes..that is a similar situation....

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    2. Sometimes one feels strongly about something and a friend/family member has a completely different point of view...it becomes difficult when thoughts do not converge...

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    3. That is true Taruna. If you value something strongly, it does create conflicts which are difficult to overcome..

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  2. Valid point . That one action or point of view sometimes destroys the trust which was built over years in a relationship (personal, professional, social , any) . And your guard is suddenly up. Cause you never thought that the person was capable of driving on the wrong side of the road.

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    1. Thanks for your comment Tirtho. Getting over even more mis-step is certainly not easy.

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  3. Very well written Bharath. Of late i can think of kapil sharma being on wrong side of road and losing his comic charm altogether maybe forever.

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  4. The key is one's own reaction, which can be influenced by expectations. There is a lot in favour of shedding extreme positions and taking the middle path

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  5. All are capable of mistakes as they are human. Or rather I would put in this way... Anyone may have a diametrically opposite view of mine... that doesn't make him no less a person. It's our greatness where we can show respect to other's diametrically opposite views and still hold our views strongly. I follow the policy of taking the best of all (gurus, friends, parents, others) and enrich my life. Respect everyone's view even if it doesn't match up mine. But hold to my views and opinions strongly.

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    1. True Arpita. I found it challenging when the issue was close to my heart and I had a strong opinion. A middle path between blind following and complete disregard can always be found.....

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  6. Very good thought. A situation we encounter so often in life. There are mentors, parents, teachers whom we have religiously followed all this while and their advise and suggestions have helped us in the past. But sometimes there are these conflicting viewpoints we come across and we need to take a call either to be a blind follower and keep faith in their experience and knowledge or go by our own judgement.!

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  7. Yes Akanksha. The middle path between blind following and total disregard, many times not immediately visible but should be found.....

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  8. I love this post because it speaks to some of how I try to view things (and sometimes I fail at viewing things). One thing I've discovered though is that we all have a piece of "truth" in what we say. I'm not sure if "truth" is the best word, but we've all got pieces of life that are really at the core of what exists. The more we can learn to share these, the more all of us are complete. Even though we've got the good in us, I'm learning that there are sometimes parts that I do no desire in others. Those parts, I'm free to leave behind if I want. Thanks for a great post on this subject. I'll be adding you to my list of blogs I read.

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    1. Thanks for your insightful comment Don. Also appreciate your tweet on this.

      It is certainly a continuous process of evolution and acceptance - of what is us and also what is different in others..

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